I often feel that I hide the “true me” from others. Not those immediately close to me (my husband), but most people aren’t aware of the true thoughts or opinions I hold. At times, I feel I am living two lives; one of social conformity and the other of spiritual authenticity. I worry too much regarding what others will think or say about my words or actions. What if they don’t conform to the norm? What if others truly know who I am? What will happen?
It is not easy following your purpose, especially when it might not align with what the rest of the world thinks of you. In the beginning of following God’s purpose, I myself, was not even sure it was the “right thing” to do.
Truth be told, I have been living two lives for the past nine years. One in pursuit of conformity with the world and one of authenticity with my God. I hope to find the strength soon to lead with spiritual authenticity in all I do, not just some of what I do. I long for the feeling of being whole, not split into two parts.
I don’t believe I am alone in this journey, though most people are more concerned about social conformity rather than spiritual authenticity. Media pushes for everyone to follow the norm and condemns those who try to lead anyone away from social conformity.
I need to be strong, to lead with authenticity. I know I can; I just need to remember…
“If God is for us, who can stand against us?” (Romans 8:31)
In the end, my authentic purpose is all that really matters!